Unfollow anyone who makes you feel like you need to be someone else. That you are not enough as you are right now. That you somehow are lacking or unworthy.
If somebody you follow’s life makes you feel shitty about yours, you probably need to unfollow them. Your self-esteem should not be affected by the social media postings of another. It’s not conducive to living a mentally healthy life. Life is way too short to spend it miserable and we spend too much time on these social media streets to continue to subject ourselves to images and posts that make us feel some type of way.
Protect Your Feelings
Even if that person is your bestie for the restie, protect your peace and unfollow them. If they are your real friend and truly love you they will understand if you’re honest with them. I’m not saying unfollow them in real life (unless you need to, but that’s a post for another day), but you don’t necessarily have to see all their life updates on social media if they are causing you to have negative feelings towards yourself or them.
For myself, there are some fitness pages that I can’t follow because seeing their abs and physical abilities make me want to just give up and go eat a donut or two. That isn’t conducive to my fitness journey. Yes, they’re sometimes motivating and inspirational, but that’s not always the case for me.
If you’ve been bitten by the travel bug, but don’t quite have the funds to take a trip, maybe following all the famous travel bloggers isn’t such a good idea. Especially if you feel a sense of envy every time you see them setting off to another destination.
For my ladies who may be lacking in certain areas physically, following all the IG models who are plumped up and not afraid to show it, isn’t good for your self-esteem. It’s not a good feeling knowing you don’t have much junk in the trunk but follow the models who do and read all the comments praising and supporting them. And if you’re someone who isn’t in the best place financially, following someone who is always flashing their wealth isn’t doing your pockets, or your feelings any good either.
It’s totally fine to follow people who motivate and inspire you to do better and live better. But when following them turns into feelings of jealousy, envy, hate, self-loathing, and any other negative emotion you may feel, you might need to cut ties.
The trouble with comparing yourself to someone’s highlight reel on social media is it will have you feeling a way about your life, assuming the wrong things about someone else’s. Someone reached out to me to get together and teach them how to budget. She wasn’t feeling the greatest about her life and wanted to take steps to change that. She figured I’d be a good person to ask because I had my own place, own car, and travel often. And also assumed I had a hefty savings accounts.
Her assumption was hella wrong.
I actually moved out of my own apartment and in with a roommate because I couldn’t afford the rent increase. I was already stretching myself thin paying $1,399 for my studio apartment, utilities not included, when the leasing office sent a renewal offer of $1,600. Excuse me? (thanks, gentrification) I sent my intent to vacate with the quickness and began searching for cheaper apartments and a roommate. I actually don’t own a car and don’t plan to anytime soon while I’m still located in the DMV area because it’s INSANELY expensive. To park it at my apartment alone is an extra $125 a month. That doesn’t even include a note, insurance, gas, maintenance, and parking in the city. Also, me and official budgets don’t exactly get along. I’ve tried everything from the envelope method to websites and apps and I just never seem to stick with them SMH. And to be perfectly honest, she had more in her savings than I did currently.
All that to say, people who seem like they have it all together on social media, sometimes don’t. And I’ll be the first one to admit that I don’t have all my shit together. So protect your peace and unfollow.
Unfollow, unfollow, unfollow.. Even if that person is me. ESPECIALLY, if that person is me.