Things I’ve Changed My Mind About In My Twenties
You know how people ask you “so how does it feel to be _____” on your birthday? I typically answer “the same way it felt to be ____”.
But, 27 is hitting differently. The changes aren’t gradual at all. I’m super self-aware and shit is just like “nope, THIS is how things are now”.
Last week, I saw a screenshot of a blog post with the following quote:
It’s okay for me to change my mind. And I only feel like I can’t do it publicly because it means that I’d have to risk appearing vulnerable, which sometimes looks like “wrong.” It’s not wrong, it’s human.
Before reading this, I’d been wrestling with the fact that I’ve changed my mind on so many “definites”—or things I thought were definites, rather. Until life, experiences, and people came along and changed my mind. I have to remind myself that there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Things change, life changes, and we change right along with it. So here’s a few things I’ve changed my mind about in my twenties:
I like flowers
I used to hate flowers, but lately I’ve been obsessed with them and I have no clue where this sudden fascination came from. But I’m embracing this newfound love. I’ve started to buy myself flowers and even add floral print to my wardrobe.
My Maternal Instincts are in overdrive
I want babies.
I think this is the biggest “I’ve changed my mind” that’s happened and I still am not 100% confident when I say it. I know all of my friends who are reading this are going “I TOLD YOU SO”, shut up. Many people told me I’d change my mind. Some said it would come with age, some said the right man would make me want them. One day I just woke up and kinda just knew I was on the verge of changing my mind.
I was always upfront about not being sure about having kids with men I’ve dated and after a similar conversation with bae he said something along the lines of “Children raised by you would be such a contribution to this world. You can’t deprive the world of that.”
I like “old” clothes
So not really old, more like mature. You know the pieces that look like they came from NY&C or Dress Barn versus H&M or F21? Don’t get me wrong, I still find myself in all kinds of stores looking for clothes but lately I’ve been more drawn to the loose and flowy, versus the tight and curvy.
Which, was what my wardrobe consisted mostly of up until now. I’m currently in the process of throwing out the old and revamping my wardrobe.
I’m no longer a Christian
This one I wasn’t sure I’d ever publicly write about, and even now I don’t think I’ll go into detail. Some of my close friends know, most don’t. I haven’t even outright told my family. I was raised Christian, I was apart of all the ministries, read all the bible stories. But that is no longer apart of my life. It’s nothing I’ve kept hidden, I just haven’t been vocal about it. I don’t want to continue answering the same questions about my reasoning, the concern for my soul, and scriptures to “bring me back.”
I still believe in God, just not in the way that I was taught to.
I’m shacking up
I never thought I’d live with someone before I married them, but here I am. Last week I officially got the keys to my new place with bae. I’m both excited and anxious about how this move will grow us.
I’m selfish with my energy
In so many areas of life, I’m now more selfish with my energy. One specific area is in my friendships. I no longer have the emotional energy I once had to over-invest in relations that I don’t feel are reciprocal.
I don’t accept someone’s character flaws as “that’s just how they are” and an excuse to be a shitty friend. Especially when they’re unwilling to change it or improve.
I’m not exempt from that. I constantly check myself if I realize I’m fucking up in a friendship. If a character flaw that I have made someone no longer want to give their energy to me, I’d understand because that ish is exhausting.
I went into my last birthday fully expecting 27 to be interesting, life-changing, scary, amazing, fun, adventurous, and everything else in between and so far it hasn’t disappointed.